Jamie, they say some questions have no answers, and yet here I am wondering how you could walk away from our babies when I was willing to do anything for us. Wondering why, no matter how hard I try, here you are still in my mind. You have been the single, largest negative impact on our kids so far in their young life and yet I still try to understand how a mother could do such a thing. Words like, selfish, sick come to mind and words from family sad, pathetic I hear often. I thank God or whatever powers may be for my strength to rise above and live for these two beautiful children who are now my center, for whom I’ll continue to do anything for (sad you wouldn’t) and it’s because of that I know I have to step up and be best the best damn father and mother these kids will ever have. Yea I lost someone who didn’t really love me, but you, you lost someone who loved you beyond measure, I think you know this. I hope one day, for the sake of the kids, you’ll do better and be better. Because right now, they need a real mother, but in any case they’ll grow up strong knowing Daddy will always be there, and one day they’ll know what their mother really is, out for herself.
Thoughts of you exhaust me.