My final words

My final words

My final words

LTME-postThis is my last words to you, because over this 2 years, i already spent too much on you.
I want to thank you for showing me after you broke up 7 mouths ago, your true mask. I Want to thank you for that, because, that was what give me strength to forget about you and finally move on.
Thank you for proving i was wrong not to believe the warnings that so many people gave me about you. In the end, the liar in the whole story was you.
It’s funny wearing the things that you said about me, that i was a monster, that i was abusive, that i slap you, that i never let you go out with your friends, that i never let you talk to boys. It’s funny because , who get slapped a lot of times, was me.
It’s funny that was you that call me so many times out of nowhere, just to know if i was really at home or at work.
It’s funny because was you that talk very bad about my friends , and i was with them, you made a huge fight about it, and the irony, is that you still have your best friends but you push me to leave mine. But yet, the monster was me right?
Can I remember you who was with you when your ex before me dump you and i was with you all night with you crying about him and i loved you already at that time?
Can I remember you who kiss another person with only a few mouths of we start dating?
Can I remember who lied to me so many times “I am home helping my mom” when the reality you were in the coffe with your friends and boys and i was working?
Can I remember you who checked my phone in my back to see my messages and my contact list?
Can I remember you who was present in the worst moment of your life and who missed work for 1 week just to be there to support you?
Can i remember you who stayed hours watching you sleep in my arms in the car because you were tired?
Can I remember you who take you all the time out to dinner and try all the times to take you to different places just you not get bored?
Can I remember who give you all the time free just to be with you?
Can I Remember you who stay a lot of nights tired from working just to be with you?
Can I Remember you who talk to your parents a lot of times just to be with you for a few moments?
Can I remember you who refused to spoke to girls just because I don’t wanted to you be mad at me?
Can I remember you who watch a lot of movies that I don’t like just because you wanted to watch them ?
Can I remember you who support your family on very different ways when your mom didn’t like me ? But supported anyway just because i want to please them?
Can I remember you who drive hours to nowhere just because you liked to be in the car with your music on and sing ?
Can I remember you that we sleep together for almost a mouth in the last summer in a house?
Can I remember you who try to take you to another country in a trip but your dad don’t let you go with me?
Can I remember you who chase you when you were mad with me for a lie that someone told you about me and you don’t spoke to me for days?
Can I remember you who call you a lot of times just to give you peace of mind for you to sleep that I was home and not going out in your back?
Can I remember who refused going out with friends just because your parents don’t let you be with me and I stayed home just to talk to you?
Can I remember who leave a lot of times in the middle of the night just to be with you 10/20 minutes just because you tell me to go?
Can I remember you who lunch with you almost every day after your school?
Can I Remember you who every day was in a gate of your school to take you home?
Can I Remember you who left me once for mouths and when you regretted received you in open arms?
Can I remember you that I give the password of my phone so you can see who I am talking to because you were always so worried?
Yes, I chase you a lot of times, yes I was a pain in the ass sometimes , yes I were obsessed some times , yes I was a complete crazy , yes i bomb your phone with text’s and call’s, yes I was completely blind for you, yes I was very mad sometimes and said some nasty stuff ( yes I called you a slut but can I remember you what you called me too? ) and yes I hurt you too sometimes and I regret it but at least I always SAID IM SORRY and i mean it. So IM SORRY for loving you all that time with all of my heart, IM SORRY for trying to keep us together, IM SORRY for not being like your ex’s boyfriend and dump you , IM SORRY for not cheating on you, IM SORRY from always wanted to be with you and wanted to marry you and have kids, IM SORRY if i was immature , IM Sorry if i don’t born with a ” relationship degree” , Im SORRY for be there all the time, IM SORRY FOR MAKING YOU MY WORLD. I know that I’m not a “perfect boyfriend”, I’m not saying that I am the last coke in the desert. I’m not saying I’m better than you, but i know now for sure now that i deserve much more. Maybe I am a monster but at least you know my true colors. You know me 100%. Right now, after I see what you are , I don’t know you anymore. I fell that I was with a person with a mask all these years. I’m not mad at you, I’m only disappointed. Because I thought you were different and that what hurted me the most. Hurt me that you said that you were different from my ex and after all , you are worst. And you can say at loud that you moved on and you are better without me, that you don’t care at me anymore. My response? Good for you! Good for you that you moved on . Good for you that you forget about me already. Don’t worry, I will not chase you, I will not call you, I will not text you, I will not be at your door waiting for hours for talking to you ( like I did several times because I was not well until we were good), I will not ask your friends for you, I will not appear on the same places that you are, I will not check you out, I will not trash talk about you to people, I will not trying make you jealous, I will not try to “control” you anymore, i will not bother you at all. That little boy is already dead. And now reborn in me. And i thank you for that, i grow up in so many levels. I will not fight for you anymore, I hope you are happy to know that. I know now that I deserve a women and not a girl. So party on and be free to suck whatever you want. If you are happy with that, go for it! The reputation you already have (I was so stupid not believing until I see it) so keep the good work. If I was a monster, maybe because was your fucking fault. If I was so worried about where you were , maybe because you lie to me so many times and cheated on me that I could not trust you 100%. Maybe I lost my mind so many times was because I was sick of your lying and your thing from hiding the true. And the stupid thing in the middle of this, was that I always stay with you like a dog and love you blindly and stay with you when you give me a lot of reasons for leaving.
Funny thing , that your friends now, were the same, that you call them sluts mouths ago when you were with me. And the worst part is that you are becoming like them and you are proud of it. It’s sad. And one day if I cross your mind, don’t worry about me. I understand after you leave me with silence treatment because you lied to me once again and block me like a coward , that you are not worth anymore. I Don’t hate you , you don’t deserve that, I m only sorry for you because of are right now, in other words, another sheep like all the girls at your age and I don’t want that to my future,
I Hope that your friends and new boyfriend , can handle your shit , your lies, give to you what I was unable to give.
So , I hope you at last, that you finish your studies, follow your dreams and live a happy life, the same way I will live mine . And believe me , i am being honest.

Good bye G

1 Comment

  1. .X 8 years ago

    This is the deepest letter I’ve read to date on this page. Smh. Good luck in life.

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