So here’s me writing about you again.
Most people would say I’m crazy for thinking about you after five years. Maybe I am but you are so special for me. Or at least you were. Because I don’t know where you are or who you’ve become, and I don’t know if you are with someone at the moment or if you have been in this time, but of what I’m sure is that there’s not a single day where I don’t think about you, in a place, in a song, in a scent, in a word or in any of our favorite videogames that we shared back in 2013. Every day I think of you and it’s hard for me to keep away from all these memories. I try to stay away from looking at your Facebook page (cuz it’s the only place where I can find you now, even if we are not friends) but something inside me really wants to send you a message, and I don’t know if I should… In the past, I’m sure I would have talked to you, but now I’m a little bit more mature and all that keeps me from pressing the send button is that I know that if you had missed me for one second, you would have contacted me by now. If you cared, you would have at least tried to contact me. Man, I tried so many times in the past, it just seems like it’s enough. I waited for any sign from you and all I get is the same silence that breaks my heart into smaller pieces. You are my first thought in the mornings and the last one before I go to sleep. When I think I’ve moved on, I have this dreams where we are back together and the scar just continues to spread. I think the reason I’m so stuck with you is that we never had a closure. You just stopped talking to me like if all of the moments we shared didn’t mean a thing to you. And that’s what hurts the most. I know we both made mistakes, and that’s ok because we were each other’s first love and we were so immature. It was just the wrong time.
I don’t know how to continue with someone else without comparing him to you, to the laughter we shared, to the light from your eyes during the sunset, to the fruit scent of your hair when I hugged you. I know I have to move on, because you’ve forgotten me by now. Five years and no one has come as close as you did. I just don’t think I can feel this way for anybody else but you.
Because after all, you’re my Wonderwall.