It’s been nearly two months since you first told me you were leaving me. I still don’t understand why?
In any case, somehow i prevented myself from thinking about it and it allowed me to continue in life normally, kinda numb, but fairly normally. But last night something happened, the barrier in my mind hiding away the memories and my feelings for you burst open and a wave of overwhelmingly powerful emotion hit me. A tingling sensation began to irritate me, it was coming from the right side of my chest, it became painful after a short while, i made the connection, that must be what heartache feels like. I still feel the black hole like sensation now.
You told me you still love me, then why leave me, you’re tearing me up inside, its like you played a game with me, but without you even asking i forgave you for hurting me and now i just miss you and want you back.
I feel so pathetic, i can’t even say this to you so I’m posting it on some stupid site where you will never see it.
I just hope saying all this somewhere helps me either move on or build the courage to ask you out for coffee.
I miss you Bagels
All my Love,