My only burned bridge

My only burned bridge

My only burned bridge

letter to your ex, letter to my ex, letters to exesDear D,

This is the only bridge I’ve ever had to burn in all my life, and it’s been pure hell, and I hate it, and I vehemently resent having to do it!

You and I need never associate again because you are a manipulative, narcissistic fool, lacking any and all capability for depth of feeling, to comprehend or truly empathize with others, and to deal with human beings on a true, loving, intimate level. Yes, I think you do a tremendous job of faking it.

You used me and my children to make yourself feel better about who you are; to look better to your family, friends, and community.

After our first six months together, when you began to behave abrasively, cruelly, contemptuously, abusively, and you realized I would not take your shit, as other women had in your previous relationships, that I stood up for myself, defended myself, preserved my dignity, your true colors became exposed. At that point, you were already done with me. You had no need of me anymore, as the emotional payoff was gone; my regular doses of inflation to your egomaniacal brain had expired, and I no longer served a purpose for you.

As I struggled financially, you had no need for me if I could not provide as you had expected. When we met, and I made a great living; you thought, okay, I’ll never have to support her, and she can contribute toward my interests and house—cha-ching. When that didn’t work out as we planned, everything began to change.

I began to see through you, and boy, did you hate it. You met your match with me, you knew I could “see” the real you, and you didn’t like it one bit. You could dish it out all day with a bullet, but you couldn’t take a lick of your own medicine.

As long as I live, I’ll never be intimidated by a man. I’ll never be controlled or manipulated by any man ever again. You opened my eyes; I can spot a sociopath a mile away now, and for that, I thank you. I am guarded around all men who show interested in me, because of you.

So, by all means, continue to walk about your diminutive pond, you Big Fish; Mr. Popularity, Mr. Nice Guy, with your extremely charming, socially warm façade. No one ever has to know the real you behind closed doors; you and your ego are safe.

I made poor choices to which I have had to own up, and have paid the harsh consequences for those choices, as have my children.

You lied to my heart about who you were, and probably lied to your own, all the while believing your own skewed versions of the truth.

Your family will never understand, and would neither examine, nor believe the truth because they love you. They love you, as they should. They’re beautiful, amazing people whom I dearly miss.

No matter what you say to me, I know you are now very much aware of how I see through your manipulative controlling behaviors. I expect them, though I no longer respond, for you are not worthy of such.

God, I loved you anyway! I actually blamed myself for so much of the insanity I felt from your crazy words and actions, for what went wrong between us, for such a long time. I genuinely began to second guess my every action, my every word, how I mothered my children, my own beliefs, my own decision making skills, even my own self-worth, and doubted my very sanity. I wasn’t crazy at all. I knew it then, but I REALLY know it now.

So, you can keep your criticisms, judgments, and obscenities to yourself from now on, you pathetic, ostentatious miscreant, as I am no longer your captive audience.

In the words of another good witch I know, “You have no power, here. Be gone! Before somebody drops a house on you!” You can kiss my royal ass “goodbye.”


(Formerly) Your Better Half


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