Dear Jt, two months ago… we had everything. December, 23rd. You asked me to be your special Christmas present. I said yes, we were perfect. I remember when I first admitted I liked you ! (: I was so happy when you felt the same. Although we didn’t have the best chemistry in talking, it didn’t matter! You were mine and I was yours. That’s honestly all that mattered. I’d always write in my diary our days of progress. Honestly, about 50% of my diary has the name “Justin” on the pages ! But as I said above, we never had the best chemistry. I’d always pass by other couples, holding hands, being happy, always talking, with together 24/7. TBH isn’t that what every girl wants? Every girl, including me. I wanted that too.. but the more I realized that’s not what we had. I was getting kind of mixed emotioned. Then I had this one friend, blue, my best friend. She told me, do what makes you happy ! If you don’t have that then break up with him. I take everything blue says seriously so I really put some thought into it and after 3 months of dating I decided, I was going to cut it off. Before I proceeded with the breakup, I told blue. “I’m going to regret this.” Throughout our relationship I told you various times you were “my everything” lol now I know I meant it. Anyways! I broke up with you through Kik, anyone who has Kik knows when you send something, you can’t delete it from the person receiving the texts screen. Unless of course you had access to their phone. Alright so, I sent the text. The text consisted of things like, “I feel as we’re being distant” which was true. We didn’t follow each other that much or talk on some days. Sometimes we wouldn’t talk for 2 days. Which was very long tbh.. After I broke up with you I felt that feeling of guilt, of regret. Moments after, you had read the text. That night, I cried myself to sleep. Told you I’d regret it. Every now and then, (I mean recent throughout each month after the breakup) By the way, this happened on 4/2 I think. Anyways, every now and then, I cry myself to sleep. Sometimes the thought of you just hits me and completely tears me down. I love you Justin, the moment I broke up with you I realized I wanted to be forever. When I said you were my everything, at the moment I didn’t know I meant it. Now I do, I’m literally crying over you praying for us to get back. If I ever want another chance with you, I’ll have to admit my feelings. Just like how we got together, I had admitted I liked you. If I didn’t then would we had ever? But seriously I love you and I write so many paragraphs about you in my diary DAILY. Oops I left out the fact that he got with another girl the day after I broke up with him. Lol! ;/ But Justin.. I love you. I never stopped loving you, even though I ended our relationship I regret it. Your honestly my everything and you always made me smile with everything you did, even the little things made me so happy. Right now we’re still friends but we barley talk ;/ But just know, when we do have our little conversations like “goodmorning” “good afternoon” it makes me happy. Happy that I can keep in contact with you, even the littlest contact with you is all I need. The reason I used names in this letter is because I want you to know it’s me writing. I love you Justin, I love you, I love you, I love you. Over and over again, like I used to always say “forever and always” I don’t know if you think of me as I think of you but there is no other guy in this world that I care about more than you. I seriously fell in love with you, and no matter how hard I try to forget you, I just can’t fall out of love with you. If you messaged me as of right now, I’d stop writing this letter, and respond in a heart beat. Anything for you… anything. I love you. I really really love you.. God, I fell hard. I’m still falling ;/ I don’t want to confuse you, or mix you up. As long as your happy with your current girlfriend, Selena (the one he got with a day after our breakup) then that’s fine. As long as your happy I’ll be okay. Even when I cry myself to sleep, I’ll be ok, you know why? Because I know somewhere right now, Justin’s happy, Justin’s smiling. I will always put you before myself and I really need you to know that. Honestly, I’m crying as I’m writing this I literally wish the best for you always always always and just know you can make it through anything because you are a very strong young man and I’m so happy that your standing strong and smiling. Once you and Selena break up, I promise, I PROMISE, I’ll screenshot this letter and send it to you. I hope that when I send you this, I won’t ruin the little friendship we have as of today. I really miss you Justin. Everyday I miss you. Everyday. I love you. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO MUCH :'( :'( :'( remember our huge paragraphs we’d write each other every month anniversary stating how much we love each other. I still have all the letters you wrote to me screenshotted saved into my phone for life. Sometimes when I miss you I read them, and I read the letters I wrote to you, and it just makes me happy. What we had, honestly will be irreplaceable. But just know, I’ll always love you and care about you and if you ever need anything anything at all ask me, or if your having troubles or need a shoulder to cry on or someone to talk to I’ll always be here for you thick and thin because that’s what I promised and I meant everything I said. Your always checking up on me too, if my kik user changes, you notice, thank you. If my units are locked, you notice. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for caring. But anything, anything at all Justin, I’m here. I’m still so glad I met you. (: couldn’t be more greatful. I hope your having the best days rn and forever, you know all I wish for you is the best <3 thank you for being my boyfriend for 3 months, your honestly the best and maybe one day who knows, we might get back together and this time I'll make sure I hold it down, I'll make sure I hold it down for life. Me and you, against the world <3 I love you. I can't wait til you see this letter, you'll finally know I feel. I'm sorry for breaking up with you. Even though it probably didn't effect you as much, I'm sincerely sorry. I'm really sorry. If I ever hurt you, I'm really sorry. I'm really really sorry. I strive to make you happy (: cause that's what you make me. Love you, forever and always. -Periwinklekittyz
I miss you.