Things I’ll never be able to say to you

Things I’ll never be able to say to you

Things I’ll never be able to say to you

Dear R,

You were and still are my first love. Oh what a great thing it is to feel love for the first time. I’m so grateful that I had you as mine. Things started out weirdly between us. Sometimes I think to myself, was it fate? We randomly crossed paths 2 years ago on the internet and here I am 2 years later writing this letter.

Our “relationship” was more of a situationship because it wasn’t really an official one but it still hurts like hell. You were distant and I was too clingy for comfort. I’m sorry for making you go through all my shit lol the super cringe poetry & editing of pics HAHA maybe I was a bit stalkerish(online) but I wasn’t thinking during that time. I don’t think you ever loved me and that’s fine because I’ll never be her. No matter how hard I try, I’ll never be good enough for you. That doesn’t matter anymore but it still hurts me a lot because I truly did love you.

After our “break”, I’m sorry for being such an egotistical and narcissistic person. I shouldn’t have talked to so many guys after you but truth is I only wanted to make you jealous because you never seemed to care about me. I regret that decision terribly because 1. you still don’t care 2. I’ve just embarrassed myself because the world is so small. I hope you’re doing fine and that you’re living your best life. I never imagined that I’d be the crazy ex girlfriend lmao. Anyways, it was hard being without you. You were my rock and my everything but I was blind back then. Its crazy how delusional I was . I still watch tarot readings for your sign and stalk your Instagram every once in a while. Damn.. yeah maybe I’m not over you =( Ay but at least my money’s been looking great I guess? If we ever see each other again, idk hmu or sum lol I hate u & love u at the same time. GOD IM SO BIPOLARRR DHKJHFGSHJ okay bye


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