I wish you would miss me like I miss you. And I know you’re out partying and getting with girls every weekend. I’m alone doing nothing. I know you haven’t thought about me since the day we broke up. I think about you constantly. I know you probably even forgot that I existed. You’re at the front of my mind. I don’t know what to do anymore. I thought maybe I’d have a chance at talking to you again. But then I realized that I haven’t crossed your mind once in the past 3 months. So I don’t know what to do anymore. I want to not miss you. I want to hate you. But I can’t.
The only thing you have ever done to me, is left. And you had your reasons for that. But now we’re here. We haven’t talked since the breakup. And Chloe is thinking how could I want you back, because so much can change in 3 months. I just don’t care if they have. Because you’re you. And that is all I want. You’re the same you that held me whenever you could. You’re the same you who kissed my forehead when I was sad. The same you who kissed me like you really meant it. But most importantly, you’re the same you who left. And I can’t change that.
I know I need to get over you. I just need time. I’m not sure how long, right now it feels like it might take forever. And I’m in this constant pain every second of everyday. Wondering what I did wrong. Wondering how stupid I am to make you leave. It’s like a nightmare I can’t wake up from. What hurts the most, is knowing that you don’t care about me. That you haven’t thought about me. That I mean nothing. And thats my greatest fear. Because in the end if someone held a knife to my throat, and said one of us couldn’t stay, I would always choose me. And you would always choose you.