Wish I wouldn’t have been so scared

Wish I wouldn’t have been so scared

Wish I wouldn’t have been so scared

Hey Victoria, I recently realized that the feelings that I thought would go away didn’t, and I don’t think that they’re going to, and I want you to know that I regret a lot of what happened. I regret a lot of the decisions that I didn’t make, and that I did. I want you to know that If I could go back to that point where everything went downhill, I would take a different route, because as much as I’ll outwardly deny it,, I wish that it was me and you. I wish that I hadn’t been so scared, because I know I would have been happier with you. More free with you. Where I’m at now is so confusing, it’s always up and down, and I feel like I’m never good enough, I’m never enough to feel good about. From what I can put together it seems like your situation is at least similar. I think about you a lot. I have for a while now. I think that I’m stuck now though, I think it’s too late to try again, and I honestly don’t even know how we would. I don’t know if you would even want to. Sometimes I wish I would have made my decision when I had the chance, because I feel trapped now. I won’t say these things to you. You’re going places now, I’m proud of you, you’re doing really good in life. I really am happy for you. I’m trying to let go. I’ll probably just keep telling myself that I’m confused, and we’ll just stay as friends. But you’ll always have a section of my thoughts.

1 Comment

  1. V 9 months ago

    Please be brave and tell me this, L. I have lingering feelings for you, too and I don’t think we’ll ever make it out of this mess as long as we’re still longing and have things to say. I can’t do it myself without knowing it’s what you want.

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