Dear G,

I thought this would be forever, but I was again proven wrong. I don’t know who to blame, me, who makes these choices, or you who always seemed ready to give up on me (always is a strong word, you did show glimpses of moments where you were interested in a future with me).

I would like to say you did wrong, you definitely did wrong to me. I know you’ll never accept or even think for a moment that you could be wrong but you are this time. You would say that you never promised forever and I was the one who expected more but isn’t that what relationships are about? Starting with no commitment, learning about each other, organically growing, and loving. Getting comfortable around each other and committing to each other without having to say it out loud. I “assumed” we were going in that direction, never realizing that it was all different for you.

The other part that hurt me the most is you not even thinking about fighting for our relationship before giving up, let alone fighting you did not even consider speaking about us/ bringing the case to your parents once. I’m conflicted here, on one hand, I feel truly hurt that for you our relationship was not even worth fighting/speaking for, and on the other I know you are doing this for your family and it makes sense you would place them a step above me considering they are FAMILY and I’m just someone else.

Lastly, the idea of you overcoming this breakup so easily whereas I’m suffering almost every day is killing me. Not because I have a sadistic desire to see you suffer, but to realize that I meant only so much to you as compared to how much I have invested in you that it is making me go through so much suffering.

I do not wish anything bad for you, I did make great memories with you, and hope in the future, I’m in a happy place and when I hear your name I only remember the good things. 

I’m going to live by these words for a while “This too shall pass”

From not so dearest,

S