It’s awful really. Meeting the one. Actually having her in your life. Think about that. The one person you love more than anything. The one you see for the first time and fall for without even a thought. She’s there and she’s yours, but you can’t keep her no matter what you do. No matter how hard you try. No matter how much fixing yourself you do. She’s gone. It’s been 9 months and I’ve moved on, but still feel this way. Seeing her today for the first time so close destroyed me. The strength I thought I built up. The life I’ve been living. The way I’ve been feeling. It all came to an end with one glimpse of her. The absolute WORST part? That I know she doesn’t feel this way about me. Tough pill to swallow.
There is no chance she will ever read this, but if she ever does.. I want her to know that I pray for her every day. I want her to know that even when she feels alone, she never will be. That if she ever feels unloved or worthless that somewhere in this world is someone who thinks she’s worth so effing much and will love her until the day he can’t anymore.
I forgive you and I hope you forgive me. I love you very much and I always will. You are the one I was supposed to be with. 4 years is a long time and I’d give anything to make it all right. I’m a different man as you are a different woman. I wish we met at better times in both of our lives.