Reminiscing my good old day with you 6 years back: Jun 18 marks the end of 23 days that brought us closer. Between May 26th and today, these 23 days was the closest we have been by age. These 23 days you were just 4yrs older to me. These 23 days I wished was longer than I thought. None of these matter now. None of these should have mattered to me anyways. None of anything should have mattered to me. “Ketta pinbu knyani” as they say it in Tamil.
Days have flown by. I thought I could never get over this. The pain perhaps has gone down a bit, not to mention I still regret my past. “Better sweet” as they say. – I am waiting for this day when this feeling for you and my regrets will turn better sweet.
I often check you on facebook. So often that my google history search even suggested that I have 97% search on just one person – you. My eyes will never become tired of waiting for an update from you. I don’t know how many times I visit your page in a day. I don’t know how many times I have watch that video you shared. I don’t know how many time I would have skimmed through all those photos from album. I don’t think I am completely over you. I don’t know for some reason, I felt like there was some post on your page on May 26th every year. This time there was none. May be you got over me. May be you got over me even before I thought we broke up. May be breaking up with me was the best thing that could have ever happened in your life. I am still a human, I still feel the pain. Thanks for teaching me what it means to lose someone so close to your heart for good.
Let me just finish this post with a small story. True Story. I had this friend xxx from college. He is fat, was abused badly in his younger days. His mom pasted away when he was still a child. His dad and stepmom do not even know his birthday or never wished him. Then one day he met someone. This person brought change in him. She showed him what it means to care and be cared. She gave him everything. She gave what his mom would have given him had she been alive and more. They were soo madly in love, they got married. They toured all around the world. US, UK, Italy, Spain… Soo much of love was in the air. Then they decided to build a future and she moved to US for higher studies and he works in India.
Then suddenly something happened. Something bad. She passed away in an accident. Some rare decease when she was away in US for her higher studies while he was still in India.
He was devastated. This left a void in him that could never be filled with anything or anyone but her. It’s been 3 Years he is still not over it. He has moved out of Blore. Moved out of India. I don’t think anything has helped him. I still see him posting pictures and post on Facebook about her. Many has advised him to move on. I am sure many will empathies but never truly feel what he felt. I think I know how exactly what he felt and I still feel. Even after 5years, I feel a pain every time I think of you. I still know the feeling that day when I saw your Facebook post that said “in relationship” about a year back. I cannot get over you.
So much has happened and I only wish I could have called you to wish you on your happy birthday.
Ending this post with a drop of tear.