Hi JD,

How are you? I hope you’re doing very well, and happy. It’s been a year, over a year since you left, so yeah, it’s June, my birthday is coming again, here I am, still hoping I’ll receive a greeting from you. I miss you, really I do still miss you. Here I am, watching SOMEONE GREAT for the nth time, as I’m missing you badly again rn. We watched this together before we both left the country. I never imagined, that this, will happen to us.

I fly to Aus, then few months after, you fly going to US. We both had different lives, i was so focused on us, and I messed up badly, 

It took a year for me to see and realize my lapses and my shortcomings. I’m sorry, if I turned out being so toxic for you as you said, i held you “too tight” that you can’t breathe anymore, that you didn’t even have enough space.

You were right, I had to sort out my issues, my trauma, time helped me to sort everything out by myself, I’m sorry if I ended up hurting the person I love the most. I was a mess, but I loved you wholeheartedly in my own messy way. And I still love you, I wish I could love you better now, but I know it’s too late.

I tried to reach you out how many times, the low key possibly I can, but I didn’t get any response, when you asked for your ring back, and I heard you’re flying back home for a holiday, I quickly set all things up hoping it could reach to you before you fly back to US, hoping I’ll get a message from you, but I didn’t, and I even found out you were mocking on the things that I’ve sent, “diabetes” as you say, you and your friend were mocking on me. Then I knew, you still hate me that much.

I know you have totally erased me from your life, but up until today, every single day, I am always praying for your safety, that you are happy and living the best times of your life. ALWAYS. I love you, yes, I still do.

I tried to send you a letter last time but I just ended up saying Hi and your name. I always wanna send you something but I always end up deleting it because I know it would’ve even matter to your anymore.

I miss you, I love you. I hope you have forgiven me, I have forgiven you..

I guess we just both didn’t grow apart, we both grew up.

You’ll always be my someone great
You’ll always be my greatest love

Have a great life my love!


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